[super!locked from Naruto caste]

[sound_council]

Is that really how the rest of the world views me? As some useless attachment to a village already over run with castoffs? Is my part truly so unimportant?

I know now that I was merely acting a part scripted to me by some unknown hand, encoded in a virus. That makes it no easier, looking back.

The worst part is remembering that feeling, of truly belonging. Something that, for once, was not a lie. I didn't have to pretend, or grovel. I was allowed to voice my complaints, with little fear of repercussions. But I still was relegated a thankless job, a castaway part, that of a failure as a son and rather miserable excuse for a house keeper.

Despite being unhappy then I can recall my experiences, and feel the drastic difference between then and now. I truly am an unnecessary player, a piece who has out lived his usefulness, and is ready to be cast aside.

Lord Orochimaru doesn't need a spy who has unmasked himself. Instead he wants geniuses and children, one because of the power they offer, the other for their unquestioning loyalty. I am neither. No matter how hard I try, I shall never be so uniquely talented or driven as one such as Sasuke or Naruto. And, though I may hid my thoughts behind a mask of cool assent, he knows me to well to accept the 'lord of lies' as a child.

So I am useless to him, but far too dangerous to let go. For, in the end, I am a spy and a thief (what other definition of a ninja is there?) and if I leave I take with me far to much information about our home. Being a suspicious man, he will never believe that I wish my almost-home no harm.

I appear to be in a rather dire predicament. I no longer wish to be part of the one group willing to protect me, but I cannot leave. And though I have no desire to take the logical alternative, the option is becoming more and more appealing.

Comments

[mywaterpwnzju.livejournal.com]

Well, never thought I'd see the day.

[sound_council]

Tch. I thought I'd locked this entry from creatures like you.

[mywaterpwnzju.livejournal.com]

Looks like you failed then.

[sound_council]

Indeed. I shall not make that mistake again.

Was there a reason you wished to speak to me?

[mywaterpwnzju.livejournal.com]

I just find it interesting that you of all people are wondering what use you are to Orochimaru.

[sound_council]

I am no longer a spy. And there are plenty of competent doctors in the Sound. He has no true need of me as a bodyguard or secretary or consort. And I am not powerful enough to warrant his attention.

I suppose we have something in common. We both were of use to him for a time, but out-lived that use.

[mywaterpwnzju.livejournal.com]

Well if you think you aren't worth his attention why don't you just leave? Or try to prove you don't fucking need him either? I don't see what's got you wondering what to do.

Why the fuck does everyone talk like I WANTED to be of use to him?

[sound_council]

I am simply musing on ideas I have been thinking about for the last few months. Who knows what I will do about them.

I did not mean to suggest that. I imagine few of us truly wanted to be his experiments. But we were given little choice in the matter.

((ooc: Yes, Kabuto is thinking about leaving.))

[mywaterpwnzju.livejournal.com]

Heh, well then best of luck whatever you decide to go with.


[[ooc:Are we getting Kabuchimaru nao? 8D?]]

[sound_council]

I am a bit surprised to here that from you.

((ooc: I think so. That is, if I can get in contact with Oro-mun to work out some details.))

[mywaterpwnzju.livejournal.com]

Don't have any personal issues with you four-eyes.
No reason to play mean if you aren't going to get in my way.

[sound_council]

I suppose that is logical.
I will try not to get in you way, though I can promise nothing.